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The Bloggerhood (as seen from my window)

I'm watching a movie called "Motherhood" for the second time tonight.

Besides the really great examples of the plethora of mothers out in the real world, Uma Thurman's character is a blogger.

I've taken to watching movies about bloggers.

Even if the movie is on as background noise, I find blogger sub-texts fascinating. I'm trying really hard to mash the inspiration I see/hear into my psyche, hoping the end result will be more blog posts.

Something's missing in the translation.

I think about bloggers a lot. I try imagining the men and women, pecking away on their keyboards, some smoking incessantly, sloppily sipping Diet Coke. Or mommy bloggers who shoosh their kids over and over again... or sit their brood down at the dining room table with a crafty project that keeps them occupied for three hour spurts so mom can write fascinating observations about other moms' lives. Those bloggers always get published.

What about the nursey/midwife bloggers like me; where do they find the time? I think I have more time because my client load is light, because I have grown kids, because I only have to feed the dogs twice a day... and I can snack on almonds and raisins for hours on end without getting up except to pee. So, if I have more time, where the hell are my posts? If magazine articles were flowing like waterfalls from my fingertips, I'd kind of give me a hall pass.

But for crying in a bucket, my words are constipated, impacted... needing some Citracel caplets to eek out even a few syllables.

Maybe if I watch "Julie & Julia" one more time.

Uma Thurman's mama-character carries her Mac around with her, seemingly, everywhere. She peeks her head up while watching her son play at the public playground. She tippity taps in few moments' long spurts; how she keeps a coherent point through fits and starts is beyond me.

But, she doesn't write tomes. She writes three and four lines of thoughts at a time, those brief glimpses into her world, published several times a day. Her words demonstrate the length of time she can focus on any one thing, yet the running dialogue simmers quietly beneath the surface of her crazy frazzled life.

Oddly, I've evolved from a pretty easy-going blogger to one who feels that every. single. post. must. make. A. Statement. Where did my fun side go? Where's the humor in always nit-picking about midwifery, medicine and birth? I've lost my silly side as the blogging years have passed. I wonder where she is?

Maybe I don't need to write forever-long posts all the time. Maybe I don't always need to research my ass off before hitting the publish key. Maybe I can write three or four line posts that inspire thoughts and questions beyond "And she said this why?"

Maybe I can be funny sometimes.

Maybe I can have regular BMs with the computer... Blogging Moments. I'd certainly like to try.

Reader Comments (11)

I love everything you write. Whether you are sad, funny, crazy, crying, heartbroken, thrilled, turned-on, serious... it comes from the heart. So what if you are in a serious place where you want every piece to matter? I don't care. You are where you need to be in this time, in this space. Go with it. I know you'll make me laugh again soon.

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Goddess love you, Jen. Thank you.

September 4, 2010 | Registered CommenterNavelgazing Midwife

Maybe you could try Twittering for a change of scenery :)

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatharyne

I like your blog just the way it is.
Sure you can over share about your family, personal life, hygiene, toileting habits, and your children's personal life if you like! :)

What you write is important and educational, not the usual dribble most bloggers write, and who regurgitate the boring minutia of life.
I want to scream at "mommy" bloggers to go outside and play with your kids. I know they don't do that enough!

Keep writing important entries. Unless you have a burning desire to share the minutia of your life.

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdewi

You can blog about the mundane things anyday...I need to hear about that too. I want to be a midwife, and I want to hear all about the ins and out, and you life is important in every little part. Keep it up, but no pressure. Just be you. You are a statement just being you.


September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Frequent or occasional, serious or silly, long or short, I enjoy reading it! Do what you gotta do. :)

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStassja

Please do! I love going through your old archives and seeing all the different types of posts, from personal, to funny, to posts that are just a picture or two, informational posts, memories of your earlier birth experiences, everything. To be perfectly honest, I have spent more than one very late night reading post after post after post from the sidebar. Your blog is engaging and unique and I give a thumbs up to anything that makes it easier and more fun for you, and leads to more posts for us!

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJMT

I second the twitter suggestion. And I agree with Jen too. It's ok to be in a serious space for a time. Even if the posts become sporadic (you're doing fine on that front though...i just went back and counted, you seem to average 5ish posts a month)

We're grateful to have your posts to learn from but remember you don't owe us posts.

(When you do do funny it's great though.)

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermrsculpepper

I tried Twitter for a few days and it just seemed weird... too... fast? selfish? boring? I'm sure I didn't give it enough time and think it's a tad different (from what I can tell) than in the beginning, so m'thinks another look-see is in order. Sarah and I have *just* been talking about being active on Twitter and LinkedIn for the Networking aspects (blog posts a'comin' about networking), so funny you all should mention Twitter.

What's happened is I've shrunk the blog posts down to small comments on FB (Now, my FB midwifery page is "Navelgazing Midwife", not my personal "Barb" one) and answering comments there. It's fast, it's easy and I *love* the feedback. I get great feedback here, but not nearly as much as there. Perhaps if I wrote more here, I'd get more feedback. *laughing*

You all are FABulous for my ego. That's not why I wrote this piece, though. And this is the other condundrum about blogs; as Julie says in "Julie & Julia" "That's what blogs are, after all, Me Me Me".

What happens when "me" gets in the way of getting clients? What happens when oversharing is TMI for potential and previous clients? What happens when my reputation is one of I can't keep my mouth shut and spew everything that happens in my life, good, bad and indifferent? I'll tell you what happens. I end up with few real life friends and lovely on-line friends who aren't (necessaarily) subjected to my observations.

Yeah, a post all on its own. *sigh*

September 4, 2010 | Registered CommenterNavelgazing Midwife

I think you turn out consistently good blog posts. You may not do it daily, but when they are there, aside from a few times, they are really there.

I am always excited when your blog's name is highlighted on my bloglines/blogroll.

You can see the bigger picture most of the time. I enjoy your perspective, I learn from it, I respect it, I grow from it.

Thank you.

Perhaps someday you will be published. A book agent may just read your blog and decide its the one. Who knows. Do you want to be published?

September 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAbby

hilarious! tee hee. LOL all of the above.

September 7, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRosie

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