Since working with you, I have found a new joy in birth, midwifery. I find that when I have to bring a client in to the hospital or when they have to see you during the pregnancy, I am absolutely confident that they are getting the best care any woman could ever have.
Your kindness, your gentleness, your - dare I say - love for the women you serve radiates from your name, your face and your voice. That you touch women, hold them, weep with them goes beyond any dream of what I could hope a physician to be. That you genuinely believe in women is apparent and echoes through everything you do and say. You really are a midwife in OB's clothing. Why can't we have the majority of OB's like you, Dr. Wonderful? Why can't the others "get" that they are the ones in the wrong and you are the one in the right?
I hear through the grapevine that doctors are getting more and more pissed at your growing, fawning clients. I hear they are unhappy that you spend so much time with your clients, that you are so personal with them, that you don't have the proper OB boundaries. I am here to tell you women LOVE what you offer and to please, please don't let them beat you down. Please don't let them make you change. Please don't let your heart harden because of the partriarchal bullshit they try to throw all over you. YOU are right. THEY are wrong. YOUR style of midwifery... er, obstetrics... is phenomenal, beautiful, tremendous. Your style should be the model for all the others. If the others want fawning clients, let them melt the steel around their hearts first.
I hear that after this last birth, you were being accused of doing homebirths. Uh, that they were accusingly asking you if you were doing homebirths. Like it is some illegal crime. I pray their mean spirits don't dampen your generous one. I hope you don't push us midwives away because of the stupidity of the people you work with. If you need us to say something different when we see you in the hospital, then just let me know, please. I never want to make things hard for you. That you are openly kind to all people, midwives included, is one major reason so many clients flock to you. Most hospital staff are so cold, if not out-and-out hostile, to midwives, it scares them to see a doctor speak kindly to us. It's another ploy of manipulation to maintain the status quo. Our clients have to contend with that every day of the year! I'm sorry they are playing the same game with you. I pray that you don't pull away because of their cruel stupidity.
I can't thank you enough, so I am opening this space to let others thank you, too. You need to know how much we love you, how we wish we could clone you, how important you are in ALL of our lives - even the women and babies who will never know your hands or voice. Through my pictures and writing A Birth Unfolds... and the pictures here and here, women can know you better than they probably know their own OB's. Images speak volumes.
Thank you for everything. I am always in your service.
Barbara E. Herrera, LM, CPM